Nelcenlaphig is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, all-knowing turtle.

Nelcenlaphig created a bottom quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nelcenlaphig, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nelcenlaphig, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Nelcenlaphig's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Nelcenlaphig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Always look after injured cats.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near eagles while wearing pink rings.

5. Do not cook food in pots.