Flamfomcen is a god.
She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, compassionate
yak.
Flamfomcen created the Sunflower Galaxy six thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Flamfomcen, she will look after you all your life.
If you do not believe in
Flamfomcen, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.
Flamfomcen's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.
Flamfomcen's Holy Commandments1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near grasshopers while wearing orange jumpers and balancing eight tin spheres on your neck.
2. Do not wear platinum on your body.
3. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.
4. Never leap in the presence of voles.
5. Hamsters are unholy and should not be approached.