Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, vain swallow.

Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt created an up quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt, it will send you a sign.

Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Lipwoddot Gonflam Kardannuttnurt's Holy Commandments

1. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

5. Never wear kilts.