Orttunjab is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, ill-tempered goblin.

Orttunjab created the Andromeda Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Orttunjab, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Orttunjab, she will turn you into a puffin.

Orttunjab's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Orttunjab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt capybaras.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Feed all hungry otters.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

5. Never mention snakes.