Linflygem is a god.

She takes the form of a large, generous human.

Linflygem created a down quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Linflygem, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Linflygem, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Linflygem's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Linflygem's Holy Commandments

1. Put Linflygem first in all things.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never paint your neck mauve.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

5. Always stare at clouds.