Betbenfab is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring gnu.

Betbenfab created humankind four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betbenfab, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Betbenfab, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Betbenfab's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Betbenfab's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Never think ill of sick sheep.

4. You must love Betbenfab.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Betbenfab.