Sidfadmet is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, dishonourable gerbil.

Sidfadmet created the planet Saturn eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sidfadmet, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sidfadmet, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Sidfadmet's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Sidfadmet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not dye your hair indigo.

3. Never feed bananas to foxes while wearing fawn hats.

4. You must pray to Sidfadmet six times a day.

5. Feed all hungry monkeys.