Dudvadyattceb is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, able jaguar.

Dudvadyattceb created the cosmos three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dudvadyattceb, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Dudvadyattceb, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Dudvadyattceb's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Dudvadyattceb's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Dudvadyattceb in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity near turtles while wearing purple trousers.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.