Cetquamcep is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, quiet cobra.

Cetquamcep created a quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cetquamcep, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Cetquamcep, she will laugh at you.

Cetquamcep's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Cetquamcep's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not speak about garlic.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not shave your neck.