Fabbusingtim is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, omniscient bat.

Fabbusingtim created time and space four billion years ago.

If you believe in Fabbusingtim, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fabbusingtim, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Fabbusingtim's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Fabbusingtim's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always help tapirs.

3. Never talk about special relativity near capybaras while wearing blue trousers and balancing four gold spheres on your neck.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never go into gray rooms.