Gemnadvoghim is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, almighty wren.

Gemnadvoghim created the Virgo Supercluster five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gemnadvoghim, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gemnadvoghim, he will come to you in dreams.

Gemnadvoghim's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Gemnadvoghim's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never feed cherries to manatees while wearing black rings.

5. Always pray immersed in water.