Barnzodlin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, thoughtless fly.

Barnzodlin created the Virgo Supercluster eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Barnzodlin, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Barnzodlin, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Barnzodlin's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Barnzodlin's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of mites.

2. Never feed oranges to manatees while wearing orange corsets.

3. You must never eat wheat.

4. Do not bounce in public.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.