Dunshavkim is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, benevolent hippopotamus.

Dunshavkim created the planet Jupiter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dunshavkim, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dunshavkim, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Dunshavkim's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Dunshavkim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

2. Feed all hungry porpoises.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not wear red clothing.

5. Hide from white manatees for they are unholy.