Hamvidkab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, almighty deer.

Hamvidkab created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hamvidkab, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Hamvidkab, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hamvidkab's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Hamvidkab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always treat capybaras with great respect.

3. Always make sure there are no seals in a building before entering it.

4. Never go into magenta rooms.

5. Sheep are unholy and should not be approached.