Barngepcad is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, strong shrew.

Barngepcad created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Barngepcad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Barngepcad, he will turn you into a mouse.

Barngepcad's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Barngepcad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured geese.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Barngepcad.

3. Never go into turquoise rooms.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never think about electromagnetism.