Cipcinarf is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, clever shark.

Cipcinarf created the cosmos seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cipcinarf, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Cipcinarf, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Cipcinarf's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Cipcinarf's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cipcinarf.

2. Never talk about gravity near cats while wearing cyan shoes and balancing three copper spheres on your legs.

3. Cipcinarf must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Worship no other gods but Cipcinarf.

5. Never eat green fruit.