Bumnabteen is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, narcissistic wren.

Bumnabteen created the cosmos nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bumnabteen, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bumnabteen, it will turn you into a rock.

Bumnabteen's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Bumnabteen's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Bumnabteen.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate pigs.

4. Always treat squirrels with great respect.

5. Never feed gooseberries to sharks while wearing shoes.