Somdapcet is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, cheerful tortoise.

Somdapcet created parasitic wasps eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Somdapcet, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Somdapcet, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Somdapcet's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Somdapcet's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dogs with great respect.

2. Never write about chlorophyll.

3. You must never eat nuts.

4. Do not dye your hair green.

5. Retreat if three ants approach from the south.