Popfenceb is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, competent cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Popfenceb created gold four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Popfenceb, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Popfenceb, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Popfenceb's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Popfenceb's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your back green.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Popfenceb loves ducks, so they must be honoured.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never sit in the presence of frogs.