Bassbegbig is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unfair wombat.

Bassbegbig created the Tadpole Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bassbegbig, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bassbegbig, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bassbegbig's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Bassbegbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near snakes while wearing pink shirts and balancing five silver spheres on your feet.

2. Never mention nematodes.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never talk about ducks.