Kemfobrut is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, staggering meerkat.

Kemfobrut created humanity nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Kemfobrut, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kemfobrut, she will cry a lot.

Kemfobrut's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Kemfobrut's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not shave your chest.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Kemfobrut on top of all buildings.