Fodbatfum is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, smart lizard.

Fodbatfum created the Andromeda Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Fodbatfum, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fodbatfum, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fodbatfum's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Fodbatfum's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Retreat if nine turtles approach from the east.

3. Never feed lots of grapes to badgers while wearing blue shoes.

4. Always treat horses with great respect.

5. Erect eight platinum sculptures of Fodbatfum on top of important buildings.