Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, moody raccoon.

Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud created the world eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Fosstamten Zimlidtamgud's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never think about quantum mechanics.

5. Never feed lots of grapes to shrews while wearing turquoise ear rings.