Dabkopveen is a god.

She takes the form of a small, grumpy beaver.

Dabkopveen created a bottom quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dabkopveen, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dabkopveen, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Dabkopveen's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Dabkopveen's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never feed beans to sharks while wearing scarves.

5. Do not listen to music.