Dogontjarn is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, flying octopus.

Dogontjarn created an atom four years ago.

If you believe in Dogontjarn, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dogontjarn, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Dogontjarn's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Dogontjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of oranges to voles while wearing cyan coats.

2. Never paint your face blue.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never talk about quantum mechanics.

5. Never sing in holy places.