Komkemflanpit is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, unjust finch.

Komkemflanpit created the Small Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Komkemflanpit, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Komkemflanpit, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Komkemflanpit's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Komkemflanpit's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics near bats while wearing black ear rings.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always help aardvarks.

4. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Komkemflanpit.