Figlunfut is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, effective guinea pig.

Figlunfut created Asia two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Figlunfut, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Figlunfut, it will think nothing of it.

Figlunfut's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Figlunfut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Never feed lemons to whales while wearing turquoise shirts.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.