Dudbemhug is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, cheerful weasel.

Dudbemhug created light five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dudbemhug, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dudbemhug, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Dudbemhug's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Dudbemhug's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Dudbemhug in the centre of the settlement.

5. Dudbemhug loves swans, so they must be respected.