Fossdonpit is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, annoying octopus.

Fossdonpit created an electron nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fossdonpit, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fossdonpit, he will make you grow a tail.

Fossdonpit's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Fossdonpit's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near great tits.

2. Do not speak about lentils.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics.

5. Learn four new languages a year.