Ortbagrut is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, irritating dragon.

Ortbagrut created the cosmos five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ortbagrut, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Ortbagrut, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Ortbagrut's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Ortbagrut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt frogs.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Hide if five gulls approach from the east.

5. Do not stand on grass.