Citarmquill is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, capable salamander.

Citarmquill created time and space six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Citarmquill, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Citarmquill, he will turn you into a rat.

Citarmquill's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Citarmquill's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Always treat dogs with great respect.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Put Citarmquill first in all things.