Ont is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, weak owl.

Ont created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ont, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Ont, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Ont's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Ont's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never look at planets.