Wikbesswat is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, awesome narwhal.

Wikbesswat created energy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikbesswat, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Wikbesswat, it will throw large rocks at you.

Wikbesswat's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Wikbesswat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wikbesswat.

4. Always wear white.

5. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.