Bumfetfarfag is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, smart mouse.

Bumfetfarfag created an up quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bumfetfarfag, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bumfetfarfag, it will destroy your home planet.

Bumfetfarfag's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Bumfetfarfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics near capybaras while wearing yellow hats.

2. Do not speak about gooseberries.

3. Never think about bacteria.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Do not drink alcohol.