Gunbapaf is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, grumpy tapir.

Gunbapaf created a down quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gunbapaf, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gunbapaf, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Gunbapaf's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gunbapaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill gulls.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never talk about voles.

4. Do not wear blue clothing.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.