Damvintapbapvindid is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, narcissistic snail.

Damvintapbapvindid created vertebrates nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Damvintapbapvindid, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Damvintapbapvindid, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Damvintapbapvindid's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Damvintapbapvindid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. You must love Damvintapbapvindid.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Damvintapbapvindid loves snakes, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not wear orange clothing.