Doddinmum is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, moody mongoose.

Doddinmum created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Doddinmum, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Doddinmum, it will ignore you.

Doddinmum's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Doddinmum's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Doddinmum five times a day.

2. Doddinmum must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Worship no other gods but Doddinmum.

5. Do not listen to music.