Quafsabflantam is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, duplicitous parrot.

Quafsabflantam created snails six million years ago.

If you believe in Quafsabflantam, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Quafsabflantam, she will come to you in dreams.

Quafsabflantam's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Quafsabflantam's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat pineapples.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not keep seven goats in a large pit.

5. Put Quafsabflantam first in all things.