Fetyoklist is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, blissful monkey.

Fetyoklist created vertebrates two years ago.

If you believe in Fetyoklist, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fetyoklist, he will turn you into a puffin.

Fetyoklist's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Fetyoklist's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. You must love Fetyoklist.

5. Never wear pink shorts.