Madvedjin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, ruthless chinchilla.

Madvedjin created a top quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Madvedjin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Madvedjin, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Madvedjin's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Madvedjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

4. Feed all hungry frogs.

5. Erect five gold sculptures of Madvedjin on top of important buildings.