Yok is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, clever walrus.

Yok created matter two years ago.

If you believe in Yok, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yok, he will jump up and down on your head.

Yok's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Yok's Holy Commandments

1. Yok loves birds, so they must be respected.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Yok.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Never laugh near nematodes.

5. Do not hop in public.