Jonbommid is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, caring cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Jonbommid created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven million years ago.

If you believe in Jonbommid, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jonbommid, he will manifest in front of you.

Jonbommid's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Jonbommid's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Jonbommid.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Jonbommid loves pigs, so they must be respected.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Run away from gray whales, for they are unholy.