Yimstikcap is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, impressive swan.

Yimstikcap created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Yimstikcap, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Yimstikcap, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Yimstikcap's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Yimstikcap's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat sharks with great respect.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Yimstikcap on top of all buildings.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help sick squirrels.