Tapmisbopfig is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, unsympathetic wyrm.

Tapmisbopfig created a photon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapmisbopfig, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tapmisbopfig, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Tapmisbopfig's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Tapmisbopfig's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.