Cutnulcan is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, boastful frog.

Cutnulcan created everything that exists four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutnulcan, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cutnulcan, it will ignore you.

Cutnulcan's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Cutnulcan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never feed peas to ants while wearing gray rings.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never talk about manatees.