Pibpark is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, awesome elephant.

Pibpark created the planet Jupiter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Pibpark, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Pibpark, he will turn you into a hamster.

Pibpark's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Pibpark's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into turquoise rooms.

2. Never talk about dwarf planets.

3. Never skip near grasshopers.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

5. Never talk about fire.