Bonkpiglip is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, omniscient gerbil.

Bonkpiglip created dark energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkpiglip, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bonkpiglip, he will turn you into a mole.

Bonkpiglip's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Bonkpiglip's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured monkeys.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate capybaras.

3. Never feed wheat to frogs while wearing violet boots.

4. Never mention dogs.

5. Worship no other gods but Bonkpiglip.