Betfasbessagtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, impressive shrew.

Betfasbessagtonk created gold three million years ago.

If you believe in Betfasbessagtonk, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Betfasbessagtonk, he will laugh at you.

Betfasbessagtonk's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Betfasbessagtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no pigs in a room before entering it.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Always take life seriously.