Dingamlan is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, grumpy salamander.

Dingamlan created viruses six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dingamlan, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dingamlan, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Dingamlan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Dingamlan's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick monkeys.

2. Always obey Dingamlan's priests.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not wear violet clothing.

5. Do not hurt seals.