Quagsanomin is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, astonishing faun.

Quagsanomin created the Large Magellanic Cloud five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quagsanomin, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Quagsanomin, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Quagsanomin's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Quagsanomin's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

2. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not kill birds.

4. Always treat foxes with great respect.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.